Sickness and Sabbath

I have been sick the past week. It has been rather inconvenient and miserable. The misery was compounded by the fact that I became ill during Holy Week. Of all weeks to be sick during the year, this is by far the most inconvenient. I had parts in the Seder meal, was designing and setting up the service for Good Friday, needed to participate in our church's Holy Saturday work-day, and I looked forward to Easter service! There was so much to do and so little time to do it. To complicate matters, schoolwork and helping to plan our wedding consumed my energies. I was staying up late writing papers, getting up early to complete tasks, going to class, attending meetings, and reading books. To say the least, rest was the last thing I could afford at the moment. It was an inconvenient thing I pushed to the side so that I could accomplish all that needed to be accomplished. But, the body has a funny way of reacting to all work and no rest. There comes a point where it eventually forces you to rest. Exhaustion takes its toll. The immune system runs like a beat up Ford Pinto. Finally, Sabbath is forced upon you. Many of the tasks that I had planned to accomplish or the things I planned to attend were put on hold. They did not get accomplished. Work became secondary. My body, which God designed, had re-oriented my world. At first, I was not at all pleased with this situation. I worried about all of the "dropped" responsibilities I had neglected. I resented my body's lack of stamina. Eventually, however, I came to appreciate the "Sabbath" I had been forced to observe. The world continued without me, the church did not fail, my work eventually was completed. My lack of productivity was directly linked to my lack of rest. But, more than that, the lack of rest atrophied my ability to enjoy life at the moment. Sickness usually does not come at convenient moments, neither does Sabbath. There's always something pulling for our attention. There's always something needing to be accomplished. But, finding the value of rest can make all of the difference in how we truly live, not just exist.

Sabbath and Silent Salvation

The silence is deafening. No mighty wind, no earthquake, no fire... just silence. Sabbath and silence. "Be still, and know that I AM God." Why is it that I find the silence so difficult to dwell in? It could be that the culture around me saturates itself with busyness and sound and activity. But, I am coming more to realize that this is not even the issue. The difficulty with Sabbath and silence is that I have to come to terms with myself. I come face-to-face with myself, with my finitude, with my creature-ness. My world is re-oriented... but not around me. I find that I am lacking, insufficient, and inadequate. In short, I'm not God. I have come to the end of myself and have entered fully into the silence. It is in this silence that I hear the still small voice. "Be still, and know that I am God." In the fire of that silence, I am changed, purified, and humbled. I am creature, fully human. It is not because of what I do but because of who God is. Like Moses, I find myself on holy ground in the middle of the mundane desert of life.. Like Isaiah, I find myself a sinful man in the midst of a sinful world needing God's transformative work in my life. And, all too often, I find myself like the disciples sleeping while I should be praying. To be honest, silence is difficult to enter into fully because there is always the probability that God will reveal Himself and may change us. We drown out the still small voice, hoping to muffle the call of the Holy One. Change is rarely something we chase after and accept willingly. We inundate ourselves with noise and activity because to enter in Sabbath silence means we might meet God and be called to a new life. But, we are comfortable with the old way. We want to be God. We want to call the shots. We want to be in control. But, it is only when we recognize our created-ness and center our lives upon our Creator that we become fully human and fully present. It is only in this that we become truly free. Sabbath re-orients us, reminding us of who we are and Whose we are. We leave the noisy productivity of Egypt and walk into a desert dependence upon God.